What He Must Be...if he wants to marry my daughter by Voddie Bachman

What He Must Be... if he wants to marry my daughter by Voddie Bachman is somewhat mistitled, as it is meant to be more than just a book to hand to your future son-in-law. The author intends it to be a call to repentance for Christian men everywhere, both wed and unwed. He fills the pages with his interpretation of what Biblical manhood should be and what it should not.

Voddie Bachman is one of the teachers in a Sunday School curriculum I have used in the past and I really liked him as a teen speaker. I was looking forward to reading his book and am disappointed to admit that I am disappointed. I found this to be a difficult read. Although filled with great Biblical instruction, the tone read harshly at times. There seemed to me to be a lack of grace and occasions where other Christian perspectives that may not line up with Mr. Bachman’s were mentioned unnecessarily in derogatory tones. There were also wonderful sections that hit Scripture right on and presented challenges to men of today that I believe need to be heard and received. The last chapter on racism was well done and interesting to read from the perspective of a black man (as obviously, I am neither!).

He is very conservative in his Biblical view and promotes the headship of men, courtship, the blessing of children, and the priesthood of the father. He presents Scriptural evidence to back up his views, which I appreciate. What I had trouble with was that his opinions and those of the people he quoted frequently were presented in somewhat the same tone, without giving much leeway for different positions within the Scriptural parameters. Even when his opinions reflected mine, which they did more than they didn’t, I was put off that there wasn’t a better distinction.

Is this a book I would hand to the man who wants to marry my daughter? Not without reservations. There is treasure to be found within these pages, but it’s one of those where I would suggest taking the meat and spitting out the bones. If you are unable to add a tone of grace to your reading, please pass on this one. If you are able to read the Scripture for yourself and compare and contrast this with what is merely opinion on his part, you may find lots to chew on with this book.

What He Must ...if he wants to marry my daughter is available for $15.99. Check out other offerings and opportunities from Crossway Publishers at www.Crossway.org/blog